We have recently had an engagement in our Opera House family, and it brought up the question of when and how to ask your besties to be in your bridal party. Here’s some helpful tips…
First, this is your day, so try to set aside everyone’s expectations. Yes, this is a hard task, compromise and communication can be your best friend in wedding planning.
So when do you start asking your “crew, squad, or tribe” ???
The sooner the better is usually a good rule of thumb, especially if your bridal party will be traveling to attend the wedding and wedding festivities. You do not need to have a date picked out, but you should have a general idea of when you are planning to have the wedding. This will help your bridesmaids and groomsmen plan (budget for travel, and prepare for time off from work) for your big day.
Who do you choose? Things to consider.
There is so much pressure for couples to include everyone in their special day. Those expectations can be so stressful, remember these should be some of the happiest memories you are making. Take into account the size of the venue you are considering, what your vision is for your day (small and intimate, or a big party with everyone involved), and the rest of your friends that you are including. Will this group of people from different areas of your life get along at the events and your special day? Will you be friends with this person five years from now? If you aren’t sure, think about having that person help with other aspects of the wedding planning.
What about siblings? You might not get along great with your fiance’s siblings, or your own for that matter, but remember that you will have a lasting relationship with them, and many times, you may become closer over the years. If you aren’t sure you want them to stand up with you in your bridal party, consider asking them to be an usher, read a passage/poem during the ceremony, hand out programs, or be the guest book attendant.
Be prepared with your expectations of the bridal party responsibilities, will they have an active role in the planning (attending your dress shopping, stuffing invitations, making favors, etc.) or are you looking for them to wear the dress or tux and show up for the wedding festivities that day/weekend? Be sure to let them know how involved you want/need them to be.
How to ask.
Asking your bridal party individually may help avoid any awkward moments with others that might be expecting to be asked, and aren’t in your bridal party plans. Consider an outing with a few of your friends that you want to be in your wedding, maybe a celebratory lunch, mani-pedi date, or drinks somewhere special and meaningful to you. Or send them something fun in the mail (if they live far away), to pop the question.
This is the fun and creative part. If you haven’t joined Pinterest, we recommend signing up. The resources for event planning are endless, and there are wonderful ideas for bridal party proposals, and you can search for any theme or type of event. *BEWARE it can also be overwhelming. So be realistic in the time it takes to bring a Pinterest board to life. Here are some great ideas we found…check them out on our Pinterest page.
You can also find great items to help ‘POP’ the question here on Etsy.
However you decide to ‘POP’ the question to your bridal party, make sure you enjoy the process. Don’t worry about making it perfect, celebrate any bumps in the road and enjoy the memories made.
#vacavilleoperahouse #vacavilleoperahouseweddings #bridalpartyproposals #weddingtips